01 - 08

12h24

I feel like an unstable weather forecast.... Changing everyday... A couple days ago I was moaning about how I was going to give you space and time; depressing about losing hope and feeling lost.

Today I fill my heart and lungs up with hope. Hope is the new word.... Maybe time will only show how we cannot live without each other and how we must fight and fight and fight for the sake of love. Maybe time will help us understand and accept each other's ways, without feeling hurt or pressured by each other's behaviours or lack thereof.

Hope. Today, as much as it hurts to be apart, not being allowed to talk, see or be with you, I will hold on to hope.

Today, I need a bright and hopeful state of mind. I need to feel ok, to not have my heart drown in sorrow and heavy heart.

I love you. Gog knows I love you. 

21h06

Oh how I'd love to call you right now and spend hours on the phone as we always used to....

We always had so much to talk about....laughing and talking about anything....

I even miss our sex calls...

I keep opening the blog hoping maybe I'll find you left a comment somewhere....

Hope....hope...hope....